Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
