she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Randomize
