ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
