HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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