Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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