So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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