Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
