Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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