I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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