this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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