i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
