Can i not drive my cunt home
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
