so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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