Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
