it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
