she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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