I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
and she was petting her beer can
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
