is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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