absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Randomize
