I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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