I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
