Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
