so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Dignity is for republicans.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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