i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
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