i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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