Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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