Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
