I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
