you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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