I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
why do cheetos always look like penises
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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