You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
