I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm sobbing to NWA
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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