I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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