I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize