One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
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