yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
