I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
