What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
