Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
