We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
