I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
