we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
