We're facebook friends in real life
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
