Please don't use social media to get back at me.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
