One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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