I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
