I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
