OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
