that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
