Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
