Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I want to be your penis for a week.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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