I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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