bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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